The fact that Gaila hadn't come after her afterward or that she apparently hadn't told anyone what happened wasn't lost on Beau. She wasn't sure what to think of it. Did the fucking woman actually like being punched mid-sex or had the monk put a sufficient amount of fear into her that she decided it was better to stay away. Beau wasn't sure doing something like apologizing to her would help; it would just invite shit from the woman, though the monk rightfully deserved it. Mostly, Beau simply didn't want to be in a position where she could be affected by whatever had turned her into the angry hornball she'd been. She was terrified she'd do this again. Period. In any circumstance.
"...except I do. In the heat of the moment, I did want to do it. I might have been influenced, but it was still a choice I made." And that was the real issue here. "She might have made the emotions, but I made the action to express them. I am the one that couldn't hold my fucking temper in the one place it shouldn't ever exist. W-what if I do it again?"
(no subject)
Date: 2018-12-08 06:28 pm (UTC)"...except I do. In the heat of the moment, I did want to do it. I might have been influenced, but it was still a choice I made." And that was the real issue here. "She might have made the emotions, but I made the action to express them. I am the one that couldn't hold my fucking temper in the one place it shouldn't ever exist. W-what if I do it again?"